Augusto and Eduard
Augusto says:
"We fell in love quickly and were married after six months.
Three years later, we talked about starting a family. We considered surrogacy but it felt very businesslike so adoption was our preferred option, although after some research, we knew we would have to move to a different country if we wanted to adopt.
We’re a gay couple and Spain doesn’t prioritise LGBTQ+ couples when it comes to adoption, so we did more research and eventually decided to move to the UK.
If you want to really get to know your partner, I would recommend the adoption process!
I thought that we already knew each other deeply but as part of the process we had to discuss so many different situations that we wouldn’t otherwise have discussed.
We had conversations about our future children’s high school choices, religion, how we would support them through different life situations. I’d never been one to stop and think too much about the future, but the adoption process helps you do that.
I think adopting gives you real advantages when it comes to parenting. If you’re about to have birth children, you might just think about the immediate future, having a baby, but the adoption process asks you to think about the real long-term, all the different possibilities. I think anyone who wants to have a child should go through a process like that!
By the time we were approved to adopt, I knew it was the right thing for us, completely confident about that decision.
Adoption has also taught me lots about other people. So many people decide to adopt for so many different reasons and we met lots of lovely people, all in the same situation as us, but for different reasons.
The day our first little girl arrived was magic. We celebrate the days that each of our children came to live with us every year as they were both important and special – but the first was particularly special as that’s when we became parents.
I remember she held my hand, and I had a feeling I couldn’t describe. I’ve since spoken to my mum about it, and she said she had the same feeling when she took my hand when I was a child. Just a close feeling. I knew she was my daughter. I get emotional even now thinking about that.
There are some challenges of course. We went along to a local baby group and the group leader kept talking about the benefits of breast feeding and how that was the best way to connect with your child.
As a gay couple and as adopters breast feeding was not an option for us, but I spoke up and said that there were many ways to connect with your children. I would say to any parents in the LGBTQ+ community that you can’t be afraid to stand up for yourselves, but you must do it in an educational way – some people might just be ignorant to your situation, not hateful.
To anyone who is considering adoption, I would suggest that you start the process as you will definitely find out if it is for you as you go along.
It’s a good chance to discover if you are ready to become a parent and you can always put the process on hold if you decide you are not ready yet.
For us it has been a magic experience, just wow, but it’s important to be responsible and make the right decision for you."
If you’re thinking about adoption and want to know more, contact our team by completing our online enquiry form or call 01942 487272.
You can also find out about the adoption process at our monthly virtual information sessions.
Posted on Tuesday 5th March 2024